Tonight as Travis was hugging me goodbye, I was just overcome by emotion. I always am so grateful and amazed at how incredible I feel when I'm with him. But tonight I realized that what is really incredible is that what tiny floods of bliss I'm now experiencing are only glimpses of eternity, and that i don't know what amazing even really feels like yet. It reminded me of something I had written, reflecting on the difference in my life before and during our relationship. Tonight brought this to a whole new level of understanding, though. When imagining how wonderful our lives will be because of each other in the future, right now seems shabby in comparison (just like in this poem). And that's saying a lot.
For the First Time
the air too thick to do anything but breathe you in
and it filled my aching lungs
reaching down to the most painful part
airways clogged with coughs and wheezes
barely open to breath before
now swelled in ease with you
the rain too hard to do anything but soak me through
and it flooded my gaping powers
seeping into every thin blood vessel
veins clotted with ignorance and naivete
now pulse in ease with you
the heat too hot to do anything but burn my skin
and it fired my longing hands
scorching through each electrified nerve
touch clouded with confusion and yearning
simply reaching for fulfillment before
now satisfied in ease with you
